The geographical center of Boston is in Roxbury. Due north of the
> center we find the South End. This is not to be confused with South
> Boston, which lies directly east from the South End. North of the
> South End is East Boston and southwest of East Boston is the North
> End. Backbay was filled in years ago.
>
> Basic Rules for Driving in Boston: (Subject to change at any time)
>
> Boston is often acclaimed as the most exciting city in America in
> which to drive. Who would argue? Herewith, for newcomers and
> visitors, are a few basic rules of the road for driving in these parts:
>
> -- To obtain a general idea of how to drive in Boston, go to a Celtics
> game and carefully watch the fast break. Then get behind the wheel
> of your car and practice it.
>
> -- Never take a green light at face value. Always look right and left
> before proceeding.
>
> -- When in doubt, accelerate.
>
> -- Very generally speaking, the intransigence of the Boston driver is
> directly proportional to the expense of his American-made car, and
> inversely proportional to the expense of his foreign-made car. But in
> applying this formula, bear in mind that they are all more or less
> intransigent.
>
> -- When on a one way street, stay to the right to allow traffic to
> pass coming the other direction.
>
> -- Drivers whose cars sport "I Brake For Animals" bumper stickers
> may brake for animals, but they may not brake for you. Watch it.
>
> - Teenage drivers believe they are immortal. Don't yield to the
> temptation to teach them otherwise.
>
> - Taxicabs should always be given the right of way, unless you are
> bent on suicide.
>
> - Never, ever, stop for a pedestrian unless he flings himself under
> the wheels of your car. Most multicar pileups are caused this way.
>
> - The first parking space you see will be the last parking space you
> see. Grab it.
>
> - Learn to swerve abruptly. Boston is the home of slalom driving,
> thanks to the Registry of Motor Vehicles, which puts potholes in key
> locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them on their toes.
>
> - Never get in the way of a car that needs extensive body work.
>
> - Double-park in the North End of Boston, unless triple-parking is
> available.
>
> -- Always look both ways when running a red light.
>
> -- While it is possible to fit a 15-foot car into a 15-foot parking
> space, it is seldom possible to fit a 16-foot car into a 15-foot
> parking space. Sad but true. Don't even think of finding a 20 ft
> space.
>
> -- There is no such thing as a shortcut during rush-hour traffic in
> Boston.
>
> -- Rush 'Hour' generally only lasts from 7am until 8pm.
>
> -- It is traditional in Boston to honk your horn at cars that don't
> move the instant the light changes. Color doesn't matter.
>
> -- Never put your faith in signs that purport to provide directions.
> They are put there to confuse people who don't know their way around
> the city. And to confuse those who do but are detoured by the Big Dig.
>
> -- Use extreme caution when pulling into breakdown lanes. Breakdown
> lanes are not for breaking down, but for speeding, especially during
> rush hour. Breakdown lanes may also end without warning causing traffic
> jams as people merge back in.
>
> -- Never use directional signals, since they only confound and
> distract other Boston drivers, who are not used to them.
>
> -- Similarly, never attempt to give hand signals. Boston drivers, unused
> to such courtesies, will think you are waving them on to pass you.
>
> -- The yellow light is not, as commonly supposed outside the Boston
area,
> a signal to slow down. It is a warning to speed up and get through the
> intersection before the light turns red. As a result, yellow lights
> only light for a quarter of a second.
>
> -- Seeking eye contact with another driver revokes your right of way.
>
> - Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right.. Sidewalks
> are optional.
>
> -- In making a left turn from the right lane, employ the element of
> surprise. That is, do it as suddenly as possible, so as to stun other
> drivers. Crossing entire 4 lane roads in one block always gains the
> respect and salutes.
>
> - Speed limits are arbitrary figures posted only to make you feel
> guilty.
>
> - Whenever possible, stop in the middle of a crosswalk to ensure
> inconveniencing as many pedestrians as possible.
>
> -- Remember that the goal of every Boston driver is to get there
> first, by whatever means necessary.
>
> -- Above all, keep moving.
>
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