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Re:Old fartdom in Blighty - long and OT

To: Chris.Nevard@BSKYB.COM
Subject: Re:Old fartdom in Blighty - long and OT
From: miker15@juno.com
Date: Fri, 01 Jan 1999 23:05:41 EST
On Fri, 1 Jan 1999 15:54:00 -0000  "Nevard, Chris"
<Chris.Nevard@BSKYB.COM> writes:
>Earlier on today I went to the first MG meet of the year here in 
>Weybridge,just outside London ..............this a light hearted
>observation..........how do MG meets compare in the USA?
>
(snip)
Anyone offended by off topic ramblings - delete now

What a chuckle Chris - even though ive spent the last 18+ years trying to
re-take the colonies it sounds very much as if True British Pseudism is
alive, well and flourishing in MG circles. - All the archetypes you
mentioned brought back memories of specific examples from days of yore
when as a callow youth i plied my trade as a bar-cellarman in the employ
of Bass Carrington for 25 knicker a week and all the gin i could filch.
Different nights "dahn tha pub" brought in different clutches of misfits
Monday was the worst of them all - the local Young Conservatives would
congregate in the early evening to guffaw over "halves of cooking" - all
wearing tweedy caps and jackets with elbow patches and referring to their
women as "old gell"  - a "half of cooking" would last them most of the
evening so it was the worst money night of the week andi seldom heard
"and take one for yourself" To top it all most of them drove Tr***phs!
Tuesdays was Lions night - late middle aged greengrocers and farmers with
ruddy complexions all wearing too-short military ties with grease stains
all over them - many ragged black dogs would also attend - the standard
order was "A pint of ordinary in a straight glass, an arrowroot biscuit
and a dish of water for the dog". Most drove "shooting brakes" or Land
Rovers .Not a bad crowd - good drinkers and theyd all leave at closing
time, pissed, having never discussed a word of whatever business Lions
are supposed to discuss!
Wednesdays was Car salesmen and Coppers - There was a Ford salesman in
town whose name was Wyatt Earp - I kid you not, i saw his driving licence
- British as the day is long but i guess his parents had a sense of
humour - the car dealers were as smooth as a gravy sandwich, most drank
G+Ts and would "spoof" the coppers for every round and win every time -
The coppers never twigged.....
Thursdays were very quiet - just regulars, Alan the Taxi Driver who would
shoot in nine or ten times between fares for a half pint of white wine
(really!) - he looked like Terry Thomas and played the part to a tee; a
retired stockbroker who drank his "pinkers" "in" would offer jobs to
anyone who would listen but never quite came through - Jeff the truck
driver who had lost three of his fingers in the door of his van and would
fight with anybody he didnt know. Then there was this aristocratic type
who called me "boy" and would drink Teachers and water til he fell over -
he drove a Roller and on one occasion sideswiped my Austin 1100 and then
denied it despite several eye witnesses - two pounds of caster sugar
found their way into his petrol tank and we never saw him again.
Fridays was students - at the time my conteporaries, not a lot of money
about but it was the night i had the best chance of pulling so it was
always something to look forward to - I used to specialize in girls who
worked in woolies or similar - they were easily impressed by an aspiring
but failed "rock star" who'd give them free drinks and then nine times
out of ten, bugger off with my mates at closing time!
I dont really remember Saturday mornings since the gin usually had done a
good job and i had the rest of the weekend off
The pub is still there - The Sergison Arms in Haywards Heath (it changed
names a couple of years ago but its still "the Sarge") - far smarter now
but i'll bet you a pint the same types are there on the same nights!

I appreciate that this didnt really answer Chris' question - but then im
British so i really dont care!!!

mike robson
69 roadster
70 BGT
53 Riley


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