Subject: If GM had kept up with
For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way
computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer expo (COMDEX),
Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and
stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we
would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000
miles to the gallon".
In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press
release stating:
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars
with the following characteristics:
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new
car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have
to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the
car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some
reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car
to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to re-install
the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five
times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent
of the roads.
6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be
replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning
light.
7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and
refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned
the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to
drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same
manner as the old car.
10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
Larry Rex
65 A/H
74 MG
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