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Crankshaft nut saga

To: british-cars@autox.team.net
Subject: Crankshaft nut saga
From: tooze@vinny.cecer.army.mil (Marcus Tooze)
Date: Fri, 8 Oct 93 09:43:05 CDT
On a more lighthearted note I've had a couple of requests to relate my
'nut' story...it beats working anyway!

My first attempt had me stood on the block, with
one foot balanced on a piece of angle iron bolted to the flywheel, and me
leaning on the alumininium tent pole which was put over the 1/2 in wrench
on the nut. As you can imagine, not a stable arrangement. I spent a few 
minutes rocking back a forth before gracefully falling forward trying to 
break my fall by exerting all my weight on the said (roomates) tent pole....
one bent tent pole stashed in the basement (hey, its winter,  he won't 
see it until next summer!).

I then moved up a grade to square 1in iron pipe and used the first balancing
technique I'd perfected earlier. PING....there went the first 1/2 in socket.
I installed MY 1/2 in socket (my roomate was goiong to be pissed off!). PING
there went my socket. Mmmmmm....a quick trip to sears provided me
with a $13 ($13!!!!) 3/4 in socket....and they wanted $44 for a 3/4 in breaker
bar!!!!I bought a 3/4 to 1/2 in converter for $6.

This time I bolted the other end of the angle iron to one of the basement 
support struts (stops the first floor from being in the basement....and
no, this ISN'T Monty Python, so don't imagine that the living room
would soon be joining me in the basement!) this 1275 was going to stay still.
I clicked on my hardware and pushed...I then tugged...I then waggled, violently
I then jumped. PING, there goes the 3/4 to 1/2 converter.

RIGHT...I'd had enough. I bought a 1/4in wall 4ft long iron pipe, rented a
3/4in breaker bar (for $5, sod the $44 Sears rip off),and I got my large boss
from work (Ed) at lunchtime. I set up the hardware...I wanted to BREAK the damn
bolt before it broke anymore equipment. I then sat on the block and relaxed
while I handed the pipe to Ed. He quietly placed the pipe over the breaker
bar and leant against it, the angle iron bowed violently, the nut creaked,
groaned, then CRASH...Ed wipes out. But, the nut was loosened HAHAHAHA at last!

Now I know why a lot of mechanics are overweight!! My measly 140lbs just
doesn't cut it. Or of cause I could have used an air wrench, hmmmmm.

Marcus


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