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Monday Funny

To: <healeys@autox.team.net>
Subject: Monday Funny
From: "Mark Goodman" <mkgoodman@worldnet.att.net>
Date: Mon, 19 Dec 2005 09:35:56 -0500
Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care
of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You
can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can
wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world
is your urinal. You never have! to drive to another gas station rest room
because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which
way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when
you're talking to them. The occasional well rendered belch is practically
expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all
the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff
about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open
all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of
thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be
your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three pack. Three pairs of shoes
are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You
are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays
its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You
only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one
color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails
with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a
mustache.. 
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.

Send this to the women who can handle it and to the men who will enjoy
reading it. 




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