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[Healeys] early Friday funny

To: Healey forum <healeys@autox.team.net>
Subject: [Healeys] early Friday funny
From: "Ph.J.Aeckerlin" <j.aeckerlin@tiscali.nl>
Date: Wed, 17 Oct 2007 08:51:00 +0200
Can't send any messages on Friday, so with my apologies for breaking the 
rules:

Five Germans in an Audi Quattro arrive at the Italian border. The 
Italian Customs Officer stops them and tells them "It's illegala to 
putta 5 people in a Quattro."
"Vot do you mean it's illegal?" asks the German driver.
"Quattro meansa four" replies the Italian official.
"Quattro is just ze name of zis fine automobile" the German says 
unbelievingly. "Look at ze car papers: ze car is designed to karry 5 
persons."
"You canta pulla thata on me!"replies the Italian officer. "Quattro 
meansa four. You have five-a people ina your car and you are thereforea 
breaking the law."
The German driver replies angrily "You idiot!. Call your zupervizor 
over. I vant to speak to somevun viz more intelligenze!"
"Sorry" responds the Italian officer. "He can'ta come. He'sa busy witha 
2 guys in a Fiat Uno."

-o-o-

A man escapes from a prison where's he's been locked up for 15 years. He 
breaks into a house to look for money. Inside, he finds a young couple 
in bed. He orders the guy out of the bed and ties him to a chair. While 
tying the woman to the bed the convict gets on top of her, kisses her 
neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.

While he's in there, the husband whispers over to his wife: "Listen, 
this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He's probably spent 
a lot of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he 
kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, just do 
whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. 
This guy is obviously very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us 
both. Be strong, honey. I love you".

His wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my 
ear. He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute, and asked if we had 
any Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love 
you".

Jack Aeckerlin, The Netherlands
1964 BJ8 29432
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