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More Off-topic Christmas nonsense!

To: "MGs (E-mail)" <mgs@Autox.Team.Net>
Subject: More Off-topic Christmas nonsense!
From: Phil Vanner <pvanner@pclink.com>
Date: Wed, 17 Dec 1997 14:42:11 -0600
The twelve days of Christmas for the politically correct:
(Whoever wrote this was very incorrect in assuming that the relevant =
fowl and bovines would necessarily have to be American. They are after =
all free creatures and would, more correctly, be considered citizens of =
the entire planet. ) =20

On the 12th day of the Eurocentrically imposed midwinter festival, my =
significant other in a consenting adult, monogamous relationship gave to =
me:
Twelve males reclaiming their inner warrior through ritual drumming
Eleven piper piping (plus the 18-member pit orchestra made up of members =
in good standing of the Musicians Equity Union as called for in their =
union contract even though they will not be asked to play a note)
Ten melanin deprived testosterone-poisoned scions of the patriarchal
ruling class system leaping
Nine persons engaged in rhythmic self-expression
Eight economically disadvantaged female persons stealing milk-products
from enslaved Bovine-Americans
Seven endangered swans swimming in federal protected wetlands
Six enslaved Fowl-Americans producing stolen non-human animal products
Five golden symbols of culturally sanctioned enforced domestic
incarcerations
(Note: after members of the Animal Liberation Front threatened to throw =
red paint at my computer, the calling birds, French hens and partridge =
have been reintroduced to their native habitat.  To avoid further =
Animal-American enslavement, the remaining gift package has been =
revised)
Four hours of recorded whale songs
Three deconstructionist poets
Two Sierra club calendars printed on recycled processed tree carcasses
And a spotted owl activist chained to an old-growth pear tree


Phil Vanner
Obsolete pollutant-emitting vehicle =20


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