The Laws for British Sports Cars
LAW OF PECULIAR RANDOM NOMENCLATURE
"The name of a British sports car shall consist primarily of letters and
numbers, with said letters and numbers chosen in random fashion so that
the resultant vehicle name is totally devoid of any meaning." This law
explains why British cars have spectacularly bad names, like "EType", or
worse yet, "MGB-GT."
The Laws for British Sports Cars
LAW OF NON-FUNCTIONAL ATTRIBUTES
"All British sports cars, regardless of condition or age, shall always
have at least one system or subsystem of components which is entirely
non-functional, and which cannot be repaired except on a semi-permanent
or semi-functional basis." (Also known as the "Lucas Electrics Law".)
The Laws for British Sports Cars
LOVE OF HARDSHIP LAW
"The more a British sports car malfunctions, breaks, and/or falls apart,
the more endearing it becomes to the owner." You buy a British sports
car. You have had it a year and a half and have replaced every item on
the car at least twice. When the engine is started, it sounds as if
someone has thrown a handful of ball bearings into a blender. But when
someone offers to buy it, you are offended because "it is like part of
the family," and besides, "it is so much fun to drive." British sports
car owners often stare into space and smile a lot.
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