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Advice From Men to Women...NO LBC

To: lwilliams@acaciapark.com, LynchCELynch@aol.com, MSuziMcD@aol.com, spridgets@autox.team.net, Tedgar5555@cs.com, dbristow5@home.com, MEGHouston@aol.com
Subject: Advice From Men to Women...NO LBC
Date: Mon, 6 Aug 2001 11:27:22 EDT
 "Advice From Men To Women"

 Never buy a 'new' brand of beer because 'it was
 on sale.'

 If we're in the backyard and the TV in the den is
 on, that doesn't mean we're not watching it.

 Don't tell anyone we can't afford a new car. Tell
 them we don't want one.

 Whenever possible please try to say whatever
 you have to say during commercials.

 Only wearing your new lingerie once does not
 send the message that you need more. It tells
 us lingerie is a bad investment.

 Please don't drive when you're not driving.

 Don't feel compelled to tell us how all the people
 in your stories are related to one another: We're
 just nodding, waiting for the punchline.

 The quarterback who just got pummeled isn't
 trying to be brave.  He's just not crying. Big
 difference!

 When the waiter asks if everything's okay, a
 simple 'Yes' is fine.



 What do you mean, 'leering?' She's obstructing
 my view.

 When I ask, 'How many guys have you slept
 with?'  It would be much appreciated if you did
 not answer honestly.

 When I'm turning the wheel and the car is nosing
 onto the off-ramp, saying 'Oh, this is our exit,
 Honey' is not really necessary.

 When you're not around, I belch so loudly that
 I even appall myself.

 The temperature in the cave will be my responsibility.
 It will be slightly to moderately cooler than you want it.

 SportsCenter starts at 10:00 P.M. and runs one
 hour.  This is an excellent time for you to pay bills,
 put laundry in the dryer, or talk to your sister.

 Is it too much to ask to have the bra match the
 underwear?

 If we see you in the morning and at night, why call
 us at work?

 You probably don't want to know what we're thinking
 about.

 It's in neither your interest nor ours to take the
 Cosmo quiz together!

I thoght this was pretty much right-on.

R Houston

  "It's alright letting yourself go, as long as you can let yourself
  back." - Mick Jagger



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