Preliminary LBC Content: No snow but froze my agates
off taking the Bugeye out to pick up Christmas lights
(no Frank, they were ALL Chinese, no choice).
As a "folk" song, it gets lyrics added/subtracted by
"folks". the song was originally a sarcastic shot at
the booming religious trinket industry. It was about
as misunderstood as Woody Guthrie's "This Land Is Your
Land", which was a protest song in response to what he
believed was exclusionary self righteous patriotism in
Irving Berlin's "God Bless America", or Springsteen's
"Born In The USA", which was thought to be a flag
waving song, but in fact is about the plight of a
Vietnam vet ("Born down in a deadman's town, first
kick I took was when I hit the ground, end up like a
dog that's been beat too much..."). The original Ernie
Marrs lyrics were (I cheated - I looked 'em up):
I don't care if it rains of freezes
'Long as I got my Plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car.
Through my trials and tribulations
And my travels through the nations
With my Plastic Jesus I'll go far.
Plastic Jesus! Plastic Jesus,
Riding on the dashboard of my car
I'm afraid He'll have to go.
His magnets ruin my radio
And if I have a wreck He'll leave a scar.
Riding down a thoroughfare
With His nose up in the air,
A wreck may be ahead, but He don't mind.
Trouble coming He don't see,
He just keeps His eye on me
And any other thing that lies behind.
Plastic Jesus! Plastic Jesus,
Riding on the dashboard of my car ...
Though the sunshine on His back
Make Him peel, chip and crack,
A little patching keeps Him up to par.
When I'm in a traffic jam
He don't care if I say "damn"
I can let all my curses roll
Plastic Jesus doesn't hear
'Cause he has a plastic ear
The man who invented plastic saved my soul.
Plastic Jesus! Plastic Jesus,
Riding on the dashboard of my car ...
Once His robe was snowy white,
Now it isn't quite so bright -
Stained by the smoke of my cigar.
If I weave around at night,
And policemen think I'm tight,
They never find my bottle - though they ask.
Plastic Jesus shelters me,
For His head comes off, you see
He's hollow, and I use Him for a flask.
Plastic Jesus! Plastic Jesus,
Riding on the dashboard of my car ...
Ride with me and have a dram
Of the blood of the Lamb -
Plastic Jesus is a holy bar.
=====
Ron Soave
"Chi spende meno spende piu."
- Aunt Tessie
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