I thought you'al might be interested in this. Perhaps in the future the
language that binds us might just separate us from our UK brethren.
The European Commission have just announced an agreement whereby English
will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was
the
other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that
English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year
phase in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish."
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will
make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard"c" will be dropped in
favor of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have
1 less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with the "f". This will make words
like "fotograf" 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted
to
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments
will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a
deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of
the silent "e"'s in the language is disgraceful, and they should go
away.
By the 4th yar, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th"
with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz yar, ze unesesary "o" kan be
dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be
aplid
to ozer kombinations of leters.
After ze fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no
mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech
ozer.
ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!!
Happen ze nez yur
Zob
|