[Shotimes] Way (OT) and Long Beware one's "so-called" friends

[Ron Porter]

Here's a little light reading about a track exercise. Dennis, the author,
has a late-model 911 and the 355.

In setting up the story for the punchline, there's some interesting stuff
along the way (a few pics at the link, also).

I believe at Blackhawk Farms, people will be checking their cars very
carefully!!  ;-)

Ron Porter 

-----Original Message-----
From: Dennis Liu [mailto:BigHeadDennis@Earthlink.net] 
Sent: Tuesday, May 27, 2003 2:13 AM
To: 911/993/996
Subject: [911] Beware one's "so-called" friends (Part I of II)

Friends, Romans and Countrymen:

	I'm still working on the exposi behind why the Ferrari Club is
responsible
for the collapse of the Old Man of the Mountain.  To whet your appetite,
here's a short (for Dennis at least) journal of betrayal at the track....

	It's the middle of May, and my window of opportunity for fun car
events is
rapidly closing.  I was scheduled to attend my cousin's wedding in Baltimore
on the weekend of May 17-18, but Todd Serota and TracQuest
(www.tracquest.com) were having another eagerly-anticipated track events at
Watkins Glen International, my favorite race track, on the Monday and
Tuesday immediately following.  What to do?

	Simple.  Pack up the 355 and road trip down to Maryland, hang out a
bit
with Creampuff Humphries, see most of my 31 first cousins (on Dad's side)
and my sister in from L.A., then head up to WGI.  After a truly fun wedding,
reception and family brunch on Sunday, I take my time and casually cruise up
through the wilds of Central Pennsylvania and NY.

	Monday dawns with sun and cool temps, just perfect for the track.
The
usual suspects are here, including Joe Capasso, Peter Lombardo and John
Tirrell with their 355 Challenge race cars, Charlie Vest in his 308, Ira
Gold in his 348ts and Bob Hatch in his red/tan 355 Berlinetta street car
(which looks exactly like mine; Tubi, Challenge rear grille, Challenge
wheels running Pirelli P-Zero slicks).  Also joining the party were
Elizabeth and Steve Miller from MD, with their E30 M3 (hers) and Porsche
944S2 (his).  As well as lots of other enthusiastic motorheads in lots of
neat machinery, from 996 Cup cars to LOTS AND LOTS of Corvettes, a Viper or
two, a fair number of 911s (of all vintages), an M car here there and
everywhere, a few Audis and everything in between.  A nice highlight
occurred when Joe surprised his son Tony with a novice driving wristband of
his own -- Tony was about to get his first track experience!  And in a 355
CH no less!

	I find myself running a bit ragged, trying to get my wheels mounted,
tire
pressures adjusted, everything cleaned up, etc.  And I'm instructing, so I'm
jogging from session to session.  The Glen looks great, with some new paving
at the apex of turn 1 and some new flagging stations, but everything else
looks pretty much the same.  Over the winter, John Tirrell (my very good
friend and owner of Independent Ferrari Service) did a very major service on
the car, and boy does it run great (with one small problem; keep reading).
While he had the engine out, he noticed that I was not getting full
throttle -- and I probably hadn't been since I bought the car.  With all the
work done to the car, I really expected it to FLY, and it did; except that
my throttle was still a little sticky at tip-in, which made driving around
town tough (lots of lurching).  I spent the Monday morning sessions just
warming up, getting everything in shape.

	At lunch time, John (with the able assistance of Bob Hatch) replaced
the
throttle cable, which seemingly cured the problem -- he pointed out that the
throttle cable had nearly melted in a couple of places, and I think the
nylon on the inside of the cable was binding; playing with it in my hands, I
could feel the resistance.  The new cable felt great, and the stickiness at
tip-in was gone.  In the first afternoon session (advanced/instructor/red
session), I passed five 911s in a row, including Marty Finkle's race car
(ok, ok, he was breaking in his new engine and short shifting and waving
everyone by, but still).  I also slowly reeled in and passed Bob, in equal
cars, that felt really good.  I even managed to catch and pass a Corvette
Z06 - still the fastest car on the track, out of the showroom, for less
than, say, $140k.  For the last session, I took out yet another student, and
took the time to point out some hints on the line (apologies, BTW, to all
the students who asked for rides; I gave rides to about 7 people, sorry I
couldn't accommodate everyone!!!).

	Monday night, we gathered for the traditional TracQuest banquet
dinner.  In
the midst of hours of chatting about cars, Bob Hatch and I discuss some
suggestions for shaving some time on the next day.  We all retire early,
with visions of quick laps dancing in our heads.  Boy, I was feeling great.

	So, of course, it can't last.

	The weather on Tuesday morning is even better.  Aside from a
nearly-disastrous refueling trip (37 minutes!), I'm ready for the day.  For
the first session, I take out Bob Armstrong, who's never been on the track
before.  We're taking it very easy, and I tell him to warn me if he gets
uncomfortable.  When John screams by in his 355CH, I mutter "ok, let's go
play some tag" into the communicator and we take off in pursuit.  Bob starts
gasping, clutching his chest, and mentions something about regretting
leaving his inhaler at home.  "Let me know if you're uncomfortable, Bob."
"Ok."  "Um, does that mean you're uncomfortable now?" "Yes."  Well, then.
Still, he did enjoy his inaugural track session a lot (or so he says).

	For the second session, I take Tony out to show him my line.  We've
got the
video camera set-up too.  We're taking yet another slow lap, to demonstrate
the line.  At the end of that lap, the red "ERIC" 911 and Bob Hatch passes
us, so away we go.  As we're trying to catch them, I comment to Tony, "boy,
Bob has really learned something from yesterday, as he seems to be going a
LOT faster.  Dang, the 911 is going faster too."  In my mirror, I can see
the red Corvette Z06 from yesterday, steadily gaining on us.  I finally pass
Bob, with the Corvette fastened to my tail.  We do the same to the 911, and
I can't shake the 'Vette.  Dang.  I was a faster than him yesterday, and now
I'm holding him up.  I had noticed the same thing with a bunch of 911s
earlier too... boy, EVERYONE seems to have picked up a lot of speed,
everyone EXCEPT me.  Double dang.

	Well, no point in holding back the Corvette.  Plus, I still have
Eric and
Bob right behind too.  So, diving down into turn 6, I give the Vette a
point-by to the left.  I stay off-line in the short straight leading to the
uphill turn 7, the Toe of the Boot.  The Corvette stays on the racing line,
and I tuck in behind him.  He turns into the corner, and gets hard onto the
power.  As he accelerates up the hill, his tail starts to slide out to the
left.

	Uh-oh.  Well, I stay on line, being careful not to lift, as I
certainly
don't want to do the same thing he's doing.  As I pass him, he's now
perpendicular to the track, and headed for the inside wall.  I can see him
out the passenger window, as he tags the wall with the nose of the car.  As
Eric and Bob tell me afterward, they thought that all four of us were going
to end up in one ball of metal and fiberglass together, but they pass safely
too.  The nose impact causes the rest of the car to complete the spin, so
the tail clips the wall too.  Looking at the Z06 after it was towed in, the
damage seems fairly cosmetic, just a new nose clip and tail piece.

	In the garage, I'm doing the post-mortem with Tony, whose eyes are
still
WIDE open.  We look at the video, and it's fairly evident that the Corvette
driver suffered from trailing-throttle oversteer; in other words, he lifted
in the corner.  It's possible it was power oversteer, but power oversteer is
fairly easy to catch (TTO is harder, as it's anti-reflexive) and there was
no evidence of that on the video.

	Anyway (hang in there, we're getting to the good part), the usual
suspects
comes crowding around the car.  John, Bob, Lombardo, Capasso, Ira and
Charlie.  They ask about the incident, and comment that I'm letting a
Corvette get around me.

Dennis:  "well, that's not really surprising; those Z06s are really, really
fast, and should be faster than me.  Though I _was_ faster than him
yesterday.  Guess he got comfortable with the track... until turn 7 at
least."

Bob:  "Sounds like you need more power, Dennis.  You were just barely
catching me today too.  Those things we discussed last night worked great,
but you need more power."

Joe:  "Yeah, Dennis, you need more power."

Peter:  "Yeah, Dennis, you need more power."

Dennis:  "Well, frankly, the car feels every bit as good as it has every
felt, and if I was going to spend more money, it would be on a Challenge
suspension, and not try to get more power out of the motor."

John:  "Oh, I don't think you need to spend a whole lot more money to get
more power."

Joe:  "Yeah, Dennis, you need more power."

Peter:  "Yeah, Dennis, you need more power."

John:  "Well, we thought you were going great yesterday, really driving the
b*lls off the car, so we took a vote."

Bob:  "Yeah, we took a vote, and we decided that we needed to slow you
down."

	Whereupon, John Tirrell, my so-called friend (not to mention the guy
to
whom I've written lots of big checks), reaches down into my car, into the
driver's footwell, and . . . .


	Comes out with a little block in his hand that he was using to block
the
gas pedal.  B*ST*RDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

	On the afternoon of the day before, when I was out instructing a
student,
Messrs. Tirrell, Hatch, Lombardo and Capasso came up with their little
scheme.  John made a little block out of racing tape and heavy cardboard
(and even painted it black so it wouldn't be visible) and wedged it under my
gas pedal.  He estimated that I was getting about 0-70% throttle.  Dang.

	Ok, ok, I had to give them credit.  I was laughing so hard, I had to
sit on
the garage floor with tears streaming down my face.

Pics available here:
http://www.photoaccess.com/share/guest.jsp?ID=AD6DEE26DA1&cb=PA

	The rest of Tuesday went off quite well too.  As usual, Todd
combined
sessions after lunch, and everyone got more track time than he or she could
take advantage of (though there was a litany of mechanical failures and
spins by various Porsches, from a 944 Turbo to a 914 to a Boxster to a 996
twin turbo).  I got a very enjoyable ride with Elizabeth Miller in her E30
M3 racecar, and we both gave husband Steve the New York salute when he
passed us.  I even enjoyed the long drive home, spending most of it plotting
my revenge on these sick b*st*rds.

	So, what have I learned?  Once again, Todd and TracQuest had a great
event
at Watkins Glen.  Never abruptly lift off the gas deep in a corner.  It is
not possible to eat one's weight in Chilean Sea Bass.  Few things are
funnier than having a "fast and furious" Civic try to goad you into a
stoplight drag race, only to have him be caught by the cop around the
corner.  And, I learned that one must never, ever trust old, fast men.  As
the saying goes, "old and wily beats young and fast" every time.  Thank
goodness I'm rapidly moving from the latter category into the former.  Well,
at least the "old" part.

vty,

--Dennis