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Middle Age- long and boring

To: mgs@Autox.Team.Net
Subject: Middle Age- long and boring
From: Bill Eastman <william.eastman@medtronic.com>
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 1998 12:19:43 -0600
As we approach the end of the millennium, it is time to reflect.  This goes
double for me because yesterday I turned 40 years old.  I am sure that a
few of my friends who knew me in my twenties lost money yesterday since, at
that time, I gave no indication that I had enough common sense to make it
this far.

People talk about a mid life crises.  I have gone through a profound change
in my approach to life in the last few years but I would not call it a
crises.  I prefer to think that I am finally working through a lot of the
issues that both drove and inhibited my behavior in the past.  Where before
I was worried about raising my children and how they impacted my life, I
now truly enjoy the time I spend with them.  Nancy and I no longer sweat
the small stuff.  We can finally just disagree on something and not make it
a week long argument that effects other areas of life.  A promotion came up
at work that I was not a perfect fit for it and I not only passed on trying
to get it, I am actually happy for the person who did get it.  This would
not have been the case five years ago in fact I left a job over just such a
situation.  Some people may look at this and say that I have lost my edge
but I think I am much more effective at work now because I don't see
everything as a competition.

Another thing that has been happening is a lot of people I knew are no
longer with us.  It is no longer drunken car crashes that are claiming my
friends.  Now it is heart problems and cancer.  Tomorrow is not guaranteed.
 Also, a lot of people count on me for emotional and financial support. 
These somewhat contradictory forces pull me towards being more supportive
and more selfish at the same time.  Nowhere is this more evident than in my
choice of recreation.

In general, I have given up nearly all forms of recreation that take me
away from home  evenings and weekends.  Softball, bars, hunting, and
fishing have all gone away.  No one else in the family shared my interest
in these so time spent was time stolen from what is really important.  Now
I go to my daughters' softball games rather than my own.  

The one hobby that has survived intact is old cars.  It can be shared with
others at so many levels that it fits into almost anyone's life style.  I
enjoy researching, buying, and working on them.  My family enjoys riding in
them.  Nancy knows where I am at night.   I am easy to buy for at Christmas
(I publish a list).   Many people, when they think of old cars, think that
it is a solitary hobby yet, thanks to this list,  I have found many kindred
spirits that I consider friends.  And unlike sitting at a bar all night,
when I spend 100 bucks on the A,  I have something to show for it besides a
hangover and bad breath.   Although I can't guarantee that breathing all of
these solvents has been any easier on my brain cells or liver.  The cars
also give me examples to use in my many discussions (lectures) with my
daughters on the importance of hard work, thinking through problems,
sticking to a job, and enjoying the art of your work.  And like it or not,
they are learning some things about cars.  

As far as my taste in cars go,  I have returned to my pre-teen preferences.
 The first cars I lusted after were 50's English cars.  It was an MGA that
officially lit my automotive fire and I am lucky enough to have one in my
garage.   Unlike many rose tinted memories, it is everything that I
remember it to be.  The XK 150 will never take the A's place but it is a
good addition.  Nancy doesn't like open cars so the XK will become the
preferred car when we go somewhere as a couple.  The A will always be the
car for early morning or late evening cobweb clearing drives as well as a
very personal meditation aid.  I hope to get it back on the autocross
course too once the kids are a little older and the weekends aren't taken
up by softball and soccer tournaments.  After 40 years you get your
priorities straight.

Regards,
Bill Eastman- now 40- Older, wiser, but "not dead yet"
Wife Nancy- forever 25 in my eyes
Daughters Lindsay (13) and Kelly (9)
61 MGA- my "cohort in crime" 
58 Jag XK150 coupe the "family sports car" or "Pile of Junk" depending on
the day
Freckles the wonder dog asleep in some spot of sunshine on the floor at
home- now there's the life!

PS  Thank you all and have a very happy new year

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