spridgets
[Top] [All Lists]

Re: No LBC - beware synthetic oil

To: "Robert Duquette" <RobertDuquette@Sympatico.ca>, "Spridgets" <spridgets@autox.team.net>
Subject: Re: No LBC - beware synthetic oil
Date: Sun, 20 Aug 2000 07:24:47 -0400
ROTGLMAOTIMEPRDML

Thanks Robert

>>>>On 8/19/00 5:40 PM so and so (Robert Duquette) said. (And I quote:)

>And we thought Allen had too much time!!!  :)
>
>Robert D.
>
>-----Original Message-----
>From: Philip S Jones <pkj@eskimo.com>
>To: Spridgets <Spridgets@autox.team.net>
>Date: August 19, 2000 5:12 PM
>Subject: No LBC - beware synthetic oil
>
>
>>My brother sent this to me from the (Kawasaki) Concours Owners Group.  No
>>LBC, but I think we can still appreciate it.
>>
>>>
>>> >From the R1 list, where a debate has been raging about oil types...
>>>
>>>Date: Thu, 18 May 2000 14:52:05 -0600
>>>From: "Michael J
>>>Subject: Beware synthetic oil
>>>
>>>Beware of synthetic oil, it can do terrible things to you and your beloved
>>>motorcycle. It will not only leak out of your engine faster than you can
>>put
>>>it in, but it will also cause your oil filter to clog and implode, dumping
>>>debris and dirt into your lubrication system.  It also will make every
>part
>>>of your bike permanently slippery because of its linear molecular chain
>>>dispersion action. Then it will leak onto your kickstand causing it to
>>>retract automatically, dropping your bike on the ground!  But that's not
>>>all...
>>>
>>>Synthetic oil will round off your gears and spin your bearings. It will
>>also
>>>splatter onto your seat causing your girlfriend to fall off in the apex of
>>a
>>>turn and she'll never ride with you again. Synthetic oil coats your sight
>>>window and your timing window with a whitish pro-emulsification additive
>>>that is both non-removable and highly corrosive. Synthetic oil will
>>>completely leak onto the ground overnight and your dog will drink it and
>>>die.
>>>
>>>Synthetic oil will wear out your tires and make your battery leak. It will
>>>give you the desperate need to urinate after you put your full leathers on
>>>and then jam your zippers shut. It will contaminate your gasoline causing
>>>your bike to stall on railroad tracks and accelerate uncontrollably near
>>>police cars. It will make it rain during rallies and on weekends. It will
>>>lubricate four timing belts causing them to jump teeth and break your
>>valves
>>>to bits. Synthetic oil chemically weakens desmodromic valves and causes
>the
>>>clearances to change every six miles. Then it melts the black soles of
>your
>>>riding boots night before you walk across your new carpeting.
>>>
>>>While riding past groups of attractive women it will cause both of your
>>>handlebar grips to slip off at the same time so you smash your windscreen
>>>with the bridge of your nose. It also causes your swingarm to crack, your
>>>studs to break, and your rotors to warp, and then it voids your warranty
>by
>>>changing your odometer reading to 55,555. It also dries out your wetclutch
>>>and wets your dryclutch. It makes your clutch slave cylinder seal fail in
>>>the heaviest traffic on the hottest day of the year while putting an angry
>>>wasp in your helmet for good measure.
>>>
>>>Synthetic oil hides your 13mm socket and puts superglue on your earplugs.
>>>Synthetic oil will scratch your faceshield and make your gloves shrink two
>>>sizes night before trackday. Synthetic oil stole your neutral and sold it
>>to
>>>the Chinese for $1.25. Synthetic oil will make you grow a tail. Synthetic
>>>oil will write long crazy e-mails to your Internet friends and then sign
>>>your name at the bottom!
>>>
>>>Mike
>>>
>>
>>
>>


Larry Macy
78 Midget

Keep your top down and your chin up.

Larry B. Macy, Ph.D.
macy@bblmail.psycha.upenn.edu
System Manager/Administrator
Neuropsychiatry Section
Department of Psychiatry
University of Pennsylvania
3400 Spruce St. - 10 Gates
Philadelphia, PA 19104

 Ask a question and you're a fool for three minutes; do not ask a 
question and you're a fool for the rest of your life. 


<Prev in Thread] Current Thread [Next in Thread>