A HISTORY OF BALLS
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Did you know, in the mighty British Navy at the time of Empire
building, every sailing ship had cannon (the plural of cannon) for
protection. Cannon of the times required round iron cannonballs.
A ship's master wanted to store the cannonballs such that they could
be available for instant use when needed, but in a manner that would
not let them roll around the gun deck.
The solution devised was to stack them up in a square-based pyramid
next to the cannon. The top level of the stack had one ball, the next
level down had three, the next had nine, the next had sixteen, and so on.
Four levels would provide a stack of 30 cannonballs. The only real
problem was how to keep the bottom level from sliding out from under
the weight of the higher levels. To do this, they devised a small brass
plate referred to as a "brass monkey," with one rounded indentation
for each cannonball in the bottom layer.
Brass was used because the cannonballs wouldn't rust on the brass monkey,
but would rust on an iron one. When temperature falls, brass contracts
faster than iron. As it got cold on the gun decks, the indentations in
the brass monkey would get smaller than the iron cannonballs they were
holding. If the temperature got cold enough, the bottom layer of cannonballs
would pop out of the indentations, spilling the entire pyramid over the
deck.
Thus it was, quite literally, "cold enough to freeze the balls off a
brass monkey." And so, another familiar phrase became part of the
language. Now, aren't you glad you took the time to read this historical
piece?
And you thought this was going to be a "dirty" story....shame on
you.
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