Zat's funy!
----- Original Message -----
From: <Gonaj@aol.com>
To: <mgs@autox.team.net>
Sent: Saturday, April 15, 2000 3:54 AM
Subject: Euro-English; no LBC content
> I just thought that you LBC folk would have a particular appreciation for
> this one.
>
> Euro-English
> ---------------
> The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby
> English will be the official language of the European Union
> rather than German, which was the other possibility.
>
> As part of the negotiations Her Majesty's Government conceded that
> English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a
> 5 year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English".
>
> In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this
> will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be
> dropped in favour of the 'k'. This should klear up konfusion and
> keyboards kan have one less letter.
>
> There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when
> the troublesome 'ph' will be replased with the 'f'. This will make
> words like 'fotograf' 20% shorter.
>
> In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be
> expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are
> possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double leters which
> have always been a deterent to akurate speling. Also al wil agre that
> the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it
> should go away.
>
> By the 4th yer peopl will be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th'
> with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'. During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o'
> be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and similar changes vud of kors
> be aplid to oza kombinations of letas.
>
> After ziz fifz yer ve vil have a rali sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no
> mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu anderstand ech
> oza. Ze drem of an united urop vil finali kum tru!
>
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