Think about it before you decide to tie your knot.
Every man should get married some time; after all,
happiness is not the only thing in life!! --Anonymous
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An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can
have; the older she gets the more interested he is
in her. --Agatha Christie
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Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair
that some men should be happier than others. -- Oscar Wilde
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Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
--Scottish Proverb
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I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for
two years. --SamKinison
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A psychiatrist is a person who will give you
expensive answers that your wife will give you for
free. --Anonymous
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Bachelors know more about women than married men;
if they didn't, they'd be married too. -- H. L. Mencken
--------------------------------------------------------
Men have a better time than women; for one thing,
they marry later; for another thing, they die
earlier. --H. L. Mencken
--------------------------------------------------------
"A man without a woman is like a fish without
abicycle." - U2
--------------------------------------------------------
Marriage is a three ring circus:
--engagement ring
---wedding ring
---suffering
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When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows
why. When a ten-yearmarried couple smiles, everyone
wonders why.
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Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.
------------------------------------------------------
When a man opens the door of his car for his
wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new
or the wife.
--------------------------------------------------------
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding
her way back.
--------------------------------------------------------
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our
anniversary?" She said, "Somewhere I have never been!" I
told her, "How about the kitchen?"
--------------------------------------------------------
We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
---------------------------------
My wife was in beauty saloon
for two hours That was only for the estimate.
--------------------------------
She got a mudpack and looked great for
two days. Then the mud fell off.
------------------------------------------
She ran after the garbage
truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"
Following her down the
street I yelled, "No, jump in!"
---------------------------------------
BaddTeddy recently explained to me why he refuses
to ever get married. He says "the wedding rings
look too much like minature handcuffs....."
-------------------------------------------------
If your dog is barking at the back door and your
wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let
in first? The Dog of course...at least he'll
shut up after you let him in!
--------------------------------------------------
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his
dearly departed mother and started back toward his
car when his attention was diverted to another
man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be
praying with profound intensity and kept repeating,
"Why did you have to die? Why did you have
to die?" The first man approached him and said,
"Sir, I don't wish to interfere with your private
grief, but this demonstration of pain is
more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you
mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?" The mourner
took a moment to collect himself, then replied,
"My wife's first husband."
--------------------------------------------------
A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband
leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The
wife decided to make a wish, too. But she
leaned over too much, fell into the well, and
drowned. The husband was stunned for a while but
then smiled "It really works!"
---------------------------------------------------
Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he
loves. After marriage, the "y" becomes silent.
__/__,_
_____(_o___o_)_______________________
/ \
| Michael Graziano |
| Long Term Capital Management L.P. |
| Phone: 203-552-5706 |
| Fax: 203-552-5869 |
| Email: mgrazian@ltcm.com |
\_____________________________________/
|