Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out after
you wear them awhile.
Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a worthless
document.
If you run, you'll only go to jail tired.
Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? In case you didn't know, that
is the average speed of a 9mm bullet fired from my gun.
So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write
anything I want on the ticket, huh?
Yes, Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will
help. Oh ....... did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?
Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or
I'll give you another ticket.
The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not.
Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?
Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride
on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey poop.
Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven.
In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC.
No, Sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now we're
allowed to write as many tickets as we want.
I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours. At
least you know someone who can post your bail.
You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign
here.
Check out the new British Cars Forum:
http://www.team.net/the-local/tiki-view_forum.php?forumId=8
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