[Shotimes] goals for the convention

[van Oss]

Goals are good.  Goals are important.  Here are my goals for the upcoming
convention:

15.  Give Don Mallinson a charming, humorous memory of last year by pulling
midnight fire alarm.
14.  Once and for all, find out if her name is "Lisa Metros" or "Lease a
Metro."
13.  Get Ben Bentley to spill everything he knows about what it takes to get
blown.
12.  Get John Hrinsin to recognize me and smile.  Okay, get John H. to smile
period.
11.  Figure out what exactly is in Tom Wallenhorst's bottle, and Harvey
Grossman's smile, maybe it's the same thing.
10.  Get Kris Angermeier out on the track.  (Is it "Anger Meyer" or "Anger
My Ear"?)
9.  One last high ride in the Lowrider.
8.  Tiny, impossible-to-vacuum, micro-confetti, Kegel's trunk, need I say
more.
7.  Win a gold award in the freakin' damn car show.
6.  Raise some eyebrows and drop some jaws with some gag awards.   Be
afraid, be very afraid.
5.  Teach a few people that a Gen2 rear spoiler really can work on a Gen1
(to hell with... you'll see...).
4.  Remember my sunglasses so I won't be frickin' blinded by Paul Thomas'
chrome rims and wax.
3.  Let's see if we can get Kerby Haltom to criticize anything at all.
2.  One smile (each) from John and Betty Weidenbenner, Eva Fourchy, and Jean
Mallinson.  This one should be easy.
1.  Kiss Angela Perfetti on the lips.  Hey, wait a minute!

Any suggestions?

Joseph van Oss