[Shotimes] OT living in Peoria & Illinois fun
Donald Mallinson
dmall@mwonline.net
Tue, 22 Jun 2004 16:13:34 -0500
Just had to share some more reasons why I love living in (or
near) Peoria, IL. That most average of cities!
1. Peoria, IL June 21: City police were in a low speed
chase of a crook that stole a delivery van as it made early
morning rounds. Police eventually apprehended the villan
and confiscated the inventory from the "Lester's Tasty
Donuts" van.
2. Caterpillar Tractor Company (headquartered in Peoria) is
still fighting public image problems as the country of
Isreal is still using their products to tear down housing in
the middle east. Protestors don't care that the items in
question have been highly modified from stock to make them
safer for drivers (bullet shields, etc) or that it isn't
illegal to sell tractors or bulldozers.
2a. Caterpillar in a stew because CAT NASCAR driver Scott
Wimmer got convicted of drunk driving. Look for protestors
in downtown Peoria soon as NASCAR fans accuse CAT of
providing beer coolers for the CAT Dodge!
3. Jack Ryan, Republican candidate for US Senate from the
Chicago area, and an ex-school teacher, was formerly married
to Jeri Lynn Ryan, otherwise known as "7 of 9" from Star
Trek Voyager, and more recently one of the teachers on
Boston Public.
Ryan has been having his Democratic opponent, Barack Obama,
followed by two teams of videographers who document every
public second of Obama's life in order to try to make
embarrasing commercials about him (at least that is what we
can assume since Ryan has had no comment other than the
"public" has a right to know what Obama does.
Also, yesterday, courts released the divorce proceeding
papers from Ryan's messy divorce. Turns out that Jeri Lynn
accused Ryan of asking her to perform a sexual act in public
at two strip clubs on trips to Paris among other exotic
locations. They didn't say exactly, but it seems clear that
he wanted something similar to what Clinton got when in
office. What is it with politicians anyway?
One of the strip clubs mentioned is in Peoria.
Sure would love to see the transcripts from the divorce
proceedings.
Jack: Oh come on, it isn't that bad of a thing!
Jeri: Ask again and you can "BORG" this!
Jack: Please, just one time
Jeri: Assimilate this!
Peoria, we may not be the best place to live in America, but
we keep you entertained!
Don Mallinson