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OT Offical command Visit

Subject: OT Offical command Visit
Date: Sat, 25 Dec 1999 00:26:21 EST
The following was in Today's Ann Landers column.  I thought it was very funny.
Enjoy everyone!

This in from Brig. Gen. Bob Clements, USAF (ret) Please read.
To: All retired Military Personnel
Subject: Official command Visit.
This office has informed of an official visit by Gen. Santa Claus to this 
base on 25 December.  The following directives will govern activities of 
personnel during this visit:
1. No creatures will stir without official permission.  This will include all 
native mice.  Special stirring permits will be obtained thought the orderly 
2. Personnel will settle their brains for a long winter nap prior to 2200 
hours.  Uniform for nap: pajamas, cotton, light drowsing, with kerchief, 
general purpose.
3. Personnel will utilize standard ration sugarplums to dance though their 
heads.  This item may be picked up the orderly room. 
4. Stocking, wool, cushion sole, will be hung by the chimneys with care.  
Necessary safety precautions will be taken to avoid fires.  Individual 
sections will submit stocking-hanging plans to Capt. Kringle by 0800 hours, 
22 December.
5. At first sign of clatter from lawn, all personnel will spring form their 
beds to investigate and evaluate cause.  Immediate action will be taken to 
tear open shutters and throw open window sashes.
6. Volunteers are needed to drive one sleigh, miniature and eight (8) deer, 
rein, tiny for use of Gen. Claus.  Driver must have current rooftop license.
7. Gen. Claus will enter all sections though chimneys.  Sections without 
chimneys will draw a Chimney simulator from Link Services for use during 
ceremonies.  Requests must be submitted in triplicate prior to 20 December.
8. All personnel will be rehearsed in shouting "Merry Christmas to all, and 
to all a good night." This shout will be given upon termination of Gen. Claus 
visit.  Uniformity of shouting is the responsibility of all section chiefs.
signed, Ebenezer Scrooge, Colonel USAF Commander.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night
Rick Ewald

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