>REDNECK MEDICAL TERMS
>> >> > > >
>> >> > > > Benign.........................What you be after you be eight.
>> >> > > > Artery..........................The study of paintings.
>> >> > > > Bacteria.......................Back door to cafeteria.
>> >> > > > Barium.........................What doctors do when patients die.
>> >> > > > Cesarean Section........A neighborhood in Rome.
>> >> > > > CAT Scan....................Searching for Kitty.
>> >> > > > Cauterize.....................Made eye contact with her.
>> >> > > > Coma...........................A punctuation mark.
>> >> > > > D&C.............................Where Washington is.
>> >> > > > Dilate...........................To live long.
>> >> > > > Enema.........................Not a friend.
>> >> > > > Fester..........................Quicker than someone else.
>> >> > > > Fibula..........................A small lie.
>> >> > > > Genital.........................Non-Jewish person.
>> >> > > > G. I. Series..................World Series of military baseball.
>> >> > > > Hangnail......................What you hang your coat on.
>> >> > > > Impotent.......................Distinguished, well known.
>> >> > > > Labor Pain...................Getting hurt at work.
>> >> > > > Medical Staff................A Doctor's cane.
>> >> > > > Morbid..........................A higher offer than I bid.
>> >> > > > Nitrates........................Cheaper than day rates.
>> >> > > > Node............................Something ya knew all along.
>> >> > > > Outpatient....................A person who has fainted.
>> >> > > > Pap Smear...................A slur against yer Daddy's honor.
>> >> > > > Pelvis...........................Second cousin to Elvis.
>> >> > > > Post Operative.............A letter carrier.
>> >> > > > Recovery Room...........Place to do re-upholstery.
>> >> > > > Rectum....................... Damn near totaled the pick-up.
>> >> > > > Secretion.................... Hiding something.
>> >> > > > Seizure........................ Roman emperor.
>> >> > > > Tablet...........................A small table.
>> >> > > > Terminal Illness............Getting sick at the airport.
>> >> > > > Tumor..........................More than one.
>> >> > > > Urine............................Opposite of "yer out."
>> >> > > > Varicose.......................Near by/close by.
Awright. Now ya gone an tore it! Y'all wuz funny before. But now yora
hittin' too close to the ol' screen door.
Thems MY peeple yora snikerin' about!
I ain't in this here group for t' be insulted. I's here for the uh,
uhm...sintillatin' discussion of issues and some intelecjule stimulatin'
fer ma brain.
And them dang parrot jokes. I love them parrot jokes.
Scott Paceley * spaceley@uiuc.edu * 217-333-8759 * Champaign, Illinois
graphic design, photography, photo-illustration
|