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FW: PC TERMS

To: <healeys@autox.team.net>
Subject: FW: PC TERMS
From: "Mark Goodman" <mkgoodman@worldnet.att.net>
Date: Thu, 19 Jan 2006 15:35:26 -0500
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

 1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" -- She is a     "BREASTED AMERICAN."

 2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" -- She is   "VOCALLY
 APPRECIATIVE."

 3. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY  ACCESSIBLE"

 4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED  DETOUR OFF THE
 INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

 5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a  "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION

 6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY  IMPAIRED."

 7. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets  "CHEMICALLY
 INCONVENIENCED."

 8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is  "MEDICALLY ENHANCED."

 9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY  REPETITIVE."

 10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY  EXTROVERTED."

 11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She is  "PECTORALLY
 SUPERIOR."

 12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST  PROVIDER."
 
 
 
 
 
    HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

 1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a  LIQUID GRAIN
 STORAGE  FACILITY."

 2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY  CAUCASIAN."

 3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He  " INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE
 DESTINATIONS."

 4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE  REGRESSION."

 5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers  "GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL
 RELATIONSHIPS."

 6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes  "ACCIDENTALLY
 HORIZONTAL."

 7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a  case of
 "RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."

8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE  EMPATHY."

 9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is
 "RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGED."

10. He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."

11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his
 pants - It's "REAR-CLEAVAGE."




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