First of all, I don't wish anyone reading the following rant to take it
personally.
Secondly, I don't seek to offend anyone.
Keeping the above in mind, I offer the list my philosophy on Lucas
electrics, based on over 40 years of experience and hundreds of thousands of
miles of Brit car driving:
If you experience electrical problems with a BMC or Triumph product, it is
due to one of about four main reasons. There may be some sub-categories
under each main reason, but, enough of this beating around the bush. Here
are the reasons:
1.) You are an idiot
2.) You are lazy
3.) Both #1 and #2
4.) The turkey who works on your car is a lazy idiot.
The only mitigating circumstance may be that your car's previous owner(s),
mechanic(s) were lazy idiots. Of course, this buys you only a short amount
of time to get it completely sorted out, and restored to proper
functionality before you, too, are labeled a lazy idiot by those of us who
are immune to news media (in this case the car mags) lies and distortions,
and who have experienced many, many years of satisfactory, reliable service
from a variety of Lucas-equipped cars.
To those of you who will respond by saying: "but, I've owned Brit cars for x
years, and have had this, that, or the other electrical problem", I refer
you to above listed items #1 and #2.
Now, quit your pathetic whining, get off your lazy butts, and learn how to
restore, maintain and trouble-shoot an electrical system.
Oh, and another thing: Carburetor is a French word meaning "leave it alone".
Bud Osbourne
-----Original Message-----
From owner-spridgets at autox.team.net
[mailto:owner-spridgets@autox.team.net]On Behalf Of
b-evans@earthlink.net
Sent: Saturday, November 26, 2005 1:54 PM
To: Chas Douglass
Cc: spridgets
Subject: Re: Ignition Wiring Problem
Chas Douglass wrote:
> Instead of fiddling with the points anymore I installed a
> Pertronix electronic ignition. ....
> So, why did that wire fry?
You thought you could replace a fine Lucas distributor with a
new-fangled gizmo, and you actually believed that you would not have
Joseph Lucas haunt and punish you? How naive! It is not nice to fool
Mother Nature or tempt the Prince of Darkness. Always remember:
Recommended procedure before taking on a repair of Lucas equipment:
check the position of the stars, kill a chicken and walk three times
sunwise around your car chanting: "Oh mighty Prince of Darkness
protect your unworthy servant."
The Lucas motto: "Get home before dark."
Buster Evans
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