This is kinda weird, but a friend last week told me how he planned to do
it. Put the chipper on board his boat, then invite the wife for a ride.
Knock her off, and put the body through the chipper, distributing the remains
into the water as chum. Next take the chipper apart and drop it in the water
piece by piece while cruising along. Probably couldn't be found by Robert
Ballard that way. Of course this is all hypothetical ... I think.
Don't do it the way a guy here in Mass. did a couple of years ago. He
did the wife in, cut her up with a sawzall and her body was never found
despite the fact the police dug up his cellar. Trouble was, the sawzall was
borrowed from his neighbor and left traces of the deceased's DNA on the
blade. Husband was convicted last week.
Then there's the other guy locally who picked a woman up at a bar and
took her home with him. Killed her and put her body in a trash barrel. Only
problem was he took the trash out in the daytime and his upstairs neighbor
saw the woman's leg hanging out of the barrel and called the cops.
Of course there's the guy who staked his wife's innards out in the back
yard after he killed her. Reason: she overcooked the pasta! (where's Soave
when you need him?)
Or how about the guy whose wife disappeared without a clue until one
night he brought the bloody mattress on which he killed her out to the woods
behind his home, right into the arms of the State Police who had staked him
out for about 2 weeks.
Then there's the guy who invited a woman along for a sailboat cruise.
They found her body half eaten by crabs and tied with the boat's anchor
chain. This genius' excuse: she got tied up in one of the boat's lines,
fell overboard, and drowned. He was so afraid no one would believe his story
he tied her up in the anchor chain and dropped her overboard. Guess what?
The jury didn't believe his story either.
We got a bunch of 'em here in Mass., topped by the unforgettable Chuck
Stuart who shot his wife after attending birthing classes, shot himself in
the stomach and called the Boston cops on his car phone. Launched a massive
hunt for the black guy he said did the deed. At least when the truth came
out, he jumped off a bridge saving my tax money from incarcerating his sorry
*ss.
Rick
In a message dated 6/6/02 11:42:45 AM, RBHouston@aol.com writes:
<<In a message dated 06/05/2002 9:12:59 PM Mountain Daylight Time,
wsthompson@thicko.com writes:
> If I'd had a pit in my garage (and maybe a woodchipper), I suspect my
> divorce might have gone a bit differently...
>
> WST
>
With a good enough wood chipper and a garden, you don't even need the pit...
..............I hear............
Robert Houston
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